Get Up and Fall Down
There’s no shortage of motivational posters, memes, books and other “pop-a-ganda” exhorting the meek, the rusty and the entrenched to get up, get going and get out of their comfort zones.
I get it – and while pretty posters with pithy words and memes don’t exactly do it for me – I’d be lying if I didn’t say I’m mostly in agreement with the sentiment behind many of these motivational words and images.
Comfort, of course, isn’t a bad thing – and a warm cup of cocoa next to a crackling fire after hours of playing in the snow never gets old…
Of course, the sleepy respite found in the cocoa/fire combo isn’t likely to provide a whole lot of personal or professional growth, learning and discovery – though one could argue that it’s a very cozy set-up for a debrief and integration session for what might have happened out in the snow…
But more on that later.
In a culture that works long and hard to sell paths to, and promises of, happy-ever-after states of homeostatic bliss, it’s easy to see why comfort zones are so appealing.
The fascinating irony is that nothing in nature is immune to the constants of change.
Equally fascinating and slightly more ironic is that human beings are the only creatures in the natural world arrogant enough to entertain – and sometimes believe – the notion that we are in some way capable of operating outside the very natural systems that give us life in the first place.
Kinda crazy, ain’t it…?
At the same time, there’s nothing in the human operating system that remotely approximates “set it and forget it” in a sustainable way.
Sure, it’s possible to dig one’s heels in and rail against the weather and tides, but all that’s likely to come of that kind of behavior is a salty soaking and some very sore heels…
And/or a whole lot of bitterness…
And/or a litany of failed relationships, jobs, businesses – if any of those things manage to get off the ground in the first place.
Stepping across, flopping through, leaping over or otherwise traversing the boundaries of the comfort zone aren’t circumstances in which one can click the “opt out” button – not when learning is on the table…
And I don’t know about you, but when I do a retrospective scan through the most fulfilling moments of my life, each and every instance happened on the other side of the comfort zone boundary.
Some were as easy as passing through a section of the boundary that was nothing more than a gossamer-thin wisp of fog, while others were akin to getting blasted through brick walls – all of which tells me that there’s not a single path but rather a broad range of experience to be had…
Some of those experiences were remarkably pleasant – first kiss, anyone? – or a magical, mind-blowing moment of creative inspiration…
Others were deeply challenging and painful – physical injuries, emotional wounds or being present with a dying loved one, for instance…
The common thread running through all of my own deep learning moments, delightful or painful?
Each and every one was remarkably, viscerally alive.
And those moments of learning and growth beyond the edges of the comfort zone? Aren’t they the very essence of what this whole “My Life on a Tiny Blue Planet” thing is all about…?
I’ll speak for myself: “Uh huh!”
Coming back to being part of the natural world, we humans live within complex systems as parts of our families, communities and the larger ecosystem
And we are complex systems unto ourselves: physical beings with the capacity to sense, think, move, emote, relate, etc. – all at the same time…
All of which points to more than a few benefits of making conscious practices of getting uncomfortable for the sake of learning.
For instance, a difficult question leads to a brilliant cognitive insight…
That informs an emotional shift…
That stimulates pleasant physical sensation…
That results in walking taller…
In a way that invites the curiosity and engagement of others…
That gets them lit up as well.
Of course, it doesn’t always go this way – but I’ll take a bit of uncomfortable change over sore heels and old tidewater stank any day…
Just in case you’re wondering, let me share just one place I’ve stepped out of my comfort zone.
I’ve been skiing for six decades. I’m good – really good – at turning left and right on steep pitches at high speeds…
This winter, though, my son and I took a Covid pass on the hill – and with mostly good conditions, we’re focusing on cross-country skate skiing.
On skate-skis, I am neither pretty nor efficient.
In fact, I have video that could be submitted as evidence that in skate-mode, I’m actually morph into a cross between a drunken duck and an overtired, determined toddler…
Consistently dragging my left leg behind at an awkward angle.
I go, I fall down, I get up and fall down again – and I get up and go again. Twice, (so far) I’ve fallen over whilst standing still.
And what I love about it is that I’m practicing being lousy at something – on the way to learning, growing and becoming better at it.
It’s UGLY – and wildly, maddeningly, frustratingly alive and…
Fun.
And while there’s other F words one can use for life outside the comfort zone, I invite you to find your own path over the boundary…
Because one of those words is fulfillment.